I'm getting discouraged.
I knew that this step in the journey would come, but so soon?
I know this trip is totally up to God, because it is way too big for me to handle.
Maybe it's because it's finals week and I am overwhelmed. I think I am giving myself a stomach ulcer. Everytime I think about how much has to be done for the trip in such a short period of time I have a mini-anxiety attack. Maybe it's not a "mini" one because I don't know what a "normal" anxiety attack looks like. Sometimes I feel like I was dropped off in the middle of nowhere and have no idea which way to turn or what the next step is. In these times I need to remember to lean on the Word and the promises that have been made.
I have prayed about this anxiety, but I once heard someone say, "Why do we pray small prayers to a big God?" Meaning that God is capable of things so much bigger than we believe is possible. That question is something that has always stuck with me. So I am constantly thinking, "Why pray for myself and my needs when there are people who need hope and healing and people who have never even heard the name of Jesus? I should pray for those people!" Why can't I do both, you may ask? Well...I guess that would be a good solution, huh? ;) I am working on this daily. I feel like a dork for being this anxious when deep down I know that God will make it work.